June 9, 2004

Cleanse

So I'm on this five-day fibre cleanse.

What the hell does the English language need with two so similar verbs? Am I cleaning my body, or cleanSing by body? And a 'fibre cleanse?' So, will I end up with the cleanest fibre on the block?

Needless to say, day three is Irritation Day. Now THAT would make a good movie about alien intrusion.

-- Fade to mission control room; UFOs float menacingly on screens as many people scurry this way and that --

Supermodel in Normalizing Glasses for Supporting Role (TM): "Sir, the aliens have reached the planet's surface."

Bill Paxton: "Where did they land, dammit!"

Supermodel, taking off glasses to show sudden uberhuman beauty: "They're... they're in the building, sir."

Bill Paxton: "Don't let 'em in, man, I'm on day three of my cleanse. If they get in here, there's no telling WHAT I'll do."

Bill Pullman: "Hey, I thought I was supposed to be the lead in this film."

-- Paxton kills Pullman with bare hands --

And the cleanse continues...

1 comment:

L said...

*laughing heartily*
I think that would be much more entertaining than Independence Day!
Good luck with the "cleansing". Let me know how you feel afterwards...I've always fancied doing something like that. You know, like "detoxing" is that the same kind of thing?