An above-average entry in the burgeoning sci-fi techno-thriller genre, Surrogates goes great lengths to show how beautiful us real, honest-to-goodness ugly humans are. It's a Premise Movie (TM), like The Matrix, Strange Days or A.I. You need to let yourself buy the idea that 98% of the world's population stays at home and sends forth surrogates -- gorgeous robotic avatars -- into the world to handle nearly every daily task. You plug into this machine with superhuman strength, agility, etc., but you send him/her/it to... work the same shitty workplace you would've gone to without one? Seems the tech hasn't eliminated the need for lousy jobs...
Willing suspension of disbelief and all that. Anyway, this film adaptation may not pack the noirish punch of the gritty graphic novel, but it's a decent popcorn flick that uses Bruce Willis's unique battered and bruised, loose cannon cop routine quite well.
Interesting sidenote: at the end of the film, random couple to our right launched into a debate about the socio-political ramifications of widely available surrogate technology. The belles behind us immediately started talking about the beauty salon / body shop - 'Like, OMG, wouldn't it be awesome to get your cheekbones done like that?'
OMG, indeed, sweetheart. O. M. G.
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
September 26, 2009
October 8, 2008
Tropic Thunder - film review, better late than never

The inevitable comparisons between Tropic Thunder and Apocalypse Now are somewhat misguided, I feel, since at the very heart of Ben Stiller's magnum opus is the desire to take the piss out of that very film. One should not compare a parody with its target on an artistic level. It's supposed to be similar, and therefore, by its very nature, denies creative comparison.
A similar mistake was made recently when Total Guitar Magazine copped a brain fart and included the Mike Flowers Pops spoof of Wonderwall on its worst cover list; Vegas-style renditions, a la Flowers or the brilliant, aptly named Richard Cheese, are not meant to be good. It's just a bonus if they are (case in point: Cheese's stellar cover of Duran Duran's Hungry Like the Wolf).
Back to the film, luckily, Tropic Thunder is good. Funny in places, most of the time thanks to Robert Downey Jr. Serious in places, interestingly thanks to Jack Black. Hilarious in its pisstake of pretty much every serious war flick since, and including, Apocalypse Now.
June 30, 2008
Sex and the City review
I had a few (emphasis on few) people tell me they'd like my movie review-lets to be posted in the main part of the blog as well as in the sidebar, so here goes:
Sex and the City (2008)
Old Horseface and her three friends are back in action, this time on the silver screen. For fans of the series, they'll be in over-dressed heaven: this cash grab is more than two hours long, and views like five or six back-to-back episodes of the show. Good for y'all, have a great time.
There isn't much to pleasantly surprise spouses of those same fans, unfortunately: SatC is still a whine-fest featuring four women who aren't happy when they're single, and find every possible reason to bitch and complain about their partners when they're not. These aren't women, they're caricatures; fashion whores who make rabid sports fans look positively well-rounded. More of the same means this film will rake in millions in a VERY short time, and probably inspire a sequel or two as well.
I have to say, my wife loved it, and I am trying to subscribe to the old adage: "Happy wife, happy life." (To Nadia: I love you honey!) That said, I won't be joining her in repeat viewings when the DVD inevitably makes its way into the collection.
Sex and the City (2008)
Old Horseface and her three friends are back in action, this time on the silver screen. For fans of the series, they'll be in over-dressed heaven: this cash grab is more than two hours long, and views like five or six back-to-back episodes of the show. Good for y'all, have a great time.
There isn't much to pleasantly surprise spouses of those same fans, unfortunately: SatC is still a whine-fest featuring four women who aren't happy when they're single, and find every possible reason to bitch and complain about their partners when they're not. These aren't women, they're caricatures; fashion whores who make rabid sports fans look positively well-rounded. More of the same means this film will rake in millions in a VERY short time, and probably inspire a sequel or two as well.
I have to say, my wife loved it, and I am trying to subscribe to the old adage: "Happy wife, happy life." (To Nadia: I love you honey!) That said, I won't be joining her in repeat viewings when the DVD inevitably makes its way into the collection.
May 26, 2008
Jonesing for the IVth film
Like most action film fans of this day & age, I knashed on Raiders of the Lost Ark and
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) -Harrison Ford still has some crack left in his bullwhip, but unfortunately he's toting on his 65-year-old shoulders a story conceived by the long-braindead George Lucas. He of the franchise-killing behemoth hasn't conceived a good story since the mid- to late-80s; that's probably why Ford refused to don the Indy Fedora for nigh on 20 years. That said, even with hamfisted period references to the late 50s, Goonies-style runaway scenes involving a small cadre of "good guys", and a storyline that would have gotten a Grade 9 creative writer shivved in the upstairs boys' room, it's fun to see Indiana Jones in action once again. This battles Temple of Doom for second place in the "best of the franchise" competition -- nothing will ever match Raiders of the Lost Ark, but that's no reason not to try once or twice more. (And I reiterate: if we can have seven different James Bonds, why not recast Jones? Ralph Fiennes would be great in the Fedora. Or hell, suave him up and give Johnny Depp a go-round as the professor. And for Pete's sake, get Lucas out of the producer's chair and get a writer worth his salt to work on the next one.)
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) -Harrison Ford still has some crack left in his bullwhip, but unfortunately he's toting on his 65-year-old shoulders a story conceived by the long-braindead George Lucas. He of the franchise-killing behemoth hasn't conceived a good story since the mid- to late-80s; that's probably why Ford refused to don the Indy Fedora for nigh on 20 years. That said, even with hamfisted period references to the late 50s, Goonies-style runaway scenes involving a small cadre of "good guys", and a storyline that would have gotten a Grade 9 creative writer shivved in the upstairs boys' room, it's fun to see Indiana Jones in action once again. This battles Temple of Doom for second place in the "best of the franchise" competition -- nothing will ever match Raiders of the Lost Ark, but that's no reason not to try once or twice more. (And I reiterate: if we can have seven different James Bonds, why not recast Jones? Ralph Fiennes would be great in the Fedora. Or hell, suave him up and give Johnny Depp a go-round as the professor. And for Pete's sake, get Lucas out of the producer's chair and get a writer worth his salt to work on the next one.)
Jonesing for the IVth Indy flick
Like most action film fans of this day & age, I knashed on Raiders of the Lost Ark long before I dropped my jaw for The Bourne Ultimatum.
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) -Harrison Ford still has some crack left in his bullwhip, but unfortunately he's toting on his 65-year-old shoulders a story conceived by the long-braindead George Lucas. He of the franchise-killing behemoth hasn't conceived a good story since the mid- to late-80s; that's probably why Ford refused to don the Indy Fedora for nigh on 20 years. That said, even with hamfisted period references to the late 50s, Goonies-style runaway scenes involving a small cadre of "good guys", and a storyline that would have gotten a Grade 9 creative writer shivved in the upstairs boys' room, it's fun to see Indiana Jones in action once again. This battles Temple of Doom for second place in the "best of the franchise" competition -- nothing will ever match Raiders of the Lost Ark, but that's no reason not to try once or twice more. (And I reiterate: if we can have seven different James Bonds, why not recast Jones? Ralph Fiennes would be great in the Fedora. Or hell, suave him up and give Johnny Depp a go-round as the professor. And for Pete's sake, get Lucas out of the producer's chair and get a writer worth his salt to work on the next one.)
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) -Harrison Ford still has some crack left in his bullwhip, but unfortunately he's toting on his 65-year-old shoulders a story conceived by the long-braindead George Lucas. He of the franchise-killing behemoth hasn't conceived a good story since the mid- to late-80s; that's probably why Ford refused to don the Indy Fedora for nigh on 20 years. That said, even with hamfisted period references to the late 50s, Goonies-style runaway scenes involving a small cadre of "good guys", and a storyline that would have gotten a Grade 9 creative writer shivved in the upstairs boys' room, it's fun to see Indiana Jones in action once again. This battles Temple of Doom for second place in the "best of the franchise" competition -- nothing will ever match Raiders of the Lost Ark, but that's no reason not to try once or twice more. (And I reiterate: if we can have seven different James Bonds, why not recast Jones? Ralph Fiennes would be great in the Fedora. Or hell, suave him up and give Johnny Depp a go-round as the professor. And for Pete's sake, get Lucas out of the producer's chair and get a writer worth his salt to work on the next one.)
May 8, 2008
Cinema Verdict: Raiders review
Cinema Verdict review of Raiders: the Adaptation
Wonderful response from an avid film fan -- nice of them to add a link and citation to our site as well!
Wonderful response from an avid film fan -- nice of them to add a link and citation to our site as well!
September 11, 2007
Bourne again
Sad to say that my summer has been defined not by sunshine and outdoor excursions, but rather by the popular culture consumed on opening weekends. I've only been hiking once yet this year (stair master masquerading as a mountain, the Grouse Grind, notwithstanding), and suffered a migraine for nearly half of that three day excursion -- but I happily devoured both Harry Potter book and movie, the Simpsons feature, and a couple of weeks ago, The Bourne Ultimatum.
Frankly, this string of Bourne films has now outdone every other series of movies I can think of. Each of the triptych is taut, smart and dammit, balls out fun. Matt Damon doesn't damage the movies, as he really doesn't have to flex any acting chops here, per se: his dialogue is limited to perhaps eight lines through the entire film. Don't get me wrong, he's better by far than, say, Keanu Reeves or even his buddy in writing, Ben Affleck. But I think we can all admit that Mr Damon isn't going to win a bevy of performance Oscars any time soon. What he does provide is believability in the role of a seriously dangerous killing machine who can't quite figure out how the hell he gained these skills.
Holy crap do the fight scenes in this flick keep the old juices flowin'. I can't remember the last time I saw this many people visibly energized by a film... People were rocking forward in their seats, faces in their hands, nervously running fingers through their hair... The entire audience was drawn, together, into this outstanding, tense universe of Jason Bourne and the 'properties' on either end of the chase.
There isn't a traditional bad guy, or good guy for that matter, in this series. The hero is a killing machine clawing back from the state of mindlessness instilled in him by his government. Even those in charge of the program have had their disrespect for human lives programmed into them by their superiors and predecessors.
The adjectival gymnastics employed by critics to describe this film are well-deserved. Even more than the first two films, this is a project that transcends genre -- it's by any stretch of the term, a masterpiece of modern art. Every member of the audience at my opening weekend showing of The Bourne Ultimatum left, breathless, limping into the lobby, weary with the glee of having seen the best action film, and one of the best films, made in decades.

Holy crap do the fight scenes in this flick keep the old juices flowin'. I can't remember the last time I saw this many people visibly energized by a film... People were rocking forward in their seats, faces in their hands, nervously running fingers through their hair... The entire audience was drawn, together, into this outstanding, tense universe of Jason Bourne and the 'properties' on either end of the chase.
There isn't a traditional bad guy, or good guy for that matter, in this series. The hero is a killing machine clawing back from the state of mindlessness instilled in him by his government. Even those in charge of the program have had their disrespect for human lives programmed into them by their superiors and predecessors.
The adjectival gymnastics employed by critics to describe this film are well-deserved. Even more than the first two films, this is a project that transcends genre -- it's by any stretch of the term, a masterpiece of modern art. Every member of the audience at my opening weekend showing of The Bourne Ultimatum left, breathless, limping into the lobby, weary with the glee of having seen the best action film, and one of the best films, made in decades.
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